A New Start...

I’m back after a very long hiatus.  When I took a break from writing (got behind in writing) it was the beginning of my son’s third year of preschool.  Now, we’re over halfway through the school year and into the second month of the new year.  It’s amazing how fast time slips by.

In the time I’ve been gone, I’ve gotten overwhelmed adjusting to a new schedule of taking The Owl to and from school and trying to spend purposeful time with The Tiger.  But what has really ended up happening is I’ve gotten myself so stressed over housecleaning, kindergarten decisions, and finding time to work on my part-time job, that I caught a virus and ended up in the hospital for 6 days.  Way to put things in perspective when you’re away from your children for the longest time ever in their lives!  It was hard and the recovery from that ordeal was slow, probably because I had gotten myself so run down in the first place.  I’m trying harder to stress less and do what the mission of this blog is- to recognize the joy in the everyday moments with my sons.

This was a very frugal Christmas for us, and I loved it.  So many gifts that were given to the boys and to family and friends were handmade.   I made a number of photo books for our family members, collecting the many photos we had taken over the year.  Looking back at our year in photos, I was struck by how many wonderful, fun, memorable moments we have shared this year.  Looking at these photos was a wonderful reminder that those times are what I will remember, and I won’t really care that the laundry was piling up or the kitchen floor was super grody. 

So here I am, back hopefully with more consistency, out of my funk and feeling hopeful that I can capture all those wonderful moments, and forget that I don’t have a maid to keep my house clean.

I need to remember to...

• Listen to music more often.  Something about hearing a great song can turn even the lousiest day around, and yet I don't do it often enough.  I'm trying to get better about putting on Pandora and playing music.  The boys enjoy it too and adds some good ambiance with having the TV on.
• Shower.  I'm not even going to admit to myself how long I'm willing to go without one, but let's just say it's a major luxury.  But it's not just about hygiene- a shower gives me a chance to decompress, relax, and have some very important alone quiet time which I need so desperately.  I feel so much better after a shower.  And since it's such a rarity, I can take a long one without feeling guilty about wasting water.
• Make phone dates with friends.  This is something else that too often falls into the "I don't have time for it" category, but it's so important to stay in touch with friends, and I always really enjoy talking with them, even if it's just to listen to each other's kids screaming in the background.
• Take some me time.  I am horrible at doing this.  I never take time to myself.  But I've started making a weekly date with myself.  We don't get an channels on our TV, but I'm a big fan of the show A Big Bang Theory, which unfortunately is not available to watch online.  So every Thursday at 8pm I'm leaving my husband to fend for himself and going over to my parent's house to watch the show, sit, and do nothing.  I'm sure there are more exciting things I could be doing, but this is a first step and it feels good.

What do you (or wish you did more) to help you feel more like you?

Music time for kids

Music is very big in our house, and while neither my husband or I have any real musical talent, we are trying to instill a love of music in our boys. Over the past few months, The Tiger and I have been taking a toddler music class, and I've learned a lot of great ideas for sharing music with children.

• Encourage free play with instruments- lay out a bunch of instruments (shakers, rhythm sticks, bells, drums, etc) and encourage them to play and experiment. Even if gets loud and annoying, they are learning about music and sound
• Play music and encourage them to dance to it. Play both fast and slow songs and ask them to dance along with the music- this will teach them about tempo.
• Give your child a simple instrument like a shaker and have them keep time with a piece of music.
• Encourage interactivity by playing songs that they can participate in- for example, "Ha, Ha, This-a-Way" which goes like this: "Ha ha, this-a-way, ha, ha that-a-way, ha, ha, this-a-way, all day long. Walking walking, up the street, walking walking, to the beat." You can change the verses to "crawling crawling oh so slow" or "dancing dancing away we go" and engage your child to follow along.
• Vary the music you play to include upbeat dancing songs and more mellow "listening" songs.

No matter what you do, just giving your child time to explore music will be fun and enriching!

(Side note: the classes we take are the Musikgarten curriculium and we love them!)

{this moment}

{this moment} - A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember. (via SouleMama)

Growing Up

My little guy is growing up. He came into the world at barely 6 lbs, a tiny helpless thing, and now, sitting next to him on our front porch, looking at his feet next to mine, it makes me both sad and happy to be struck with how grown-up he already is.

Me

This is me. Ok, so I’ve introduced you to my boys, but I haven’t really told you about me. Probably because I’m not very good at it. I’m Wendy. Hi. Nice to meet you! I’m a brown-haired, blue-eyed, 30-ish gal who is still trying to figure herself out. I’m a bit shy, I think too much, I’m emotional, intensely loyal, creative, very un-conventional in some ways and rather normal in others. I’m a bit boring, sometimes impulsive, very loving, slightly crunchy, and a bit of a plain Jane. I like Indie Rock and rap music, love goofy buddy comedies and visually stunning romantic foreign films. I’m a wife, mother, friend and dreamer. Thanks for reading!

What I Want

When my boys look back on their childhood, I want them to remember days filled with music, color, laughter, fun, love, understanding. I want them to have happy memories of happy days. I know they probably won’t even remember anything that we do right now, for they are too young, but I want to make wonderful memories that build on top of more wonderful memories, creating a wall of happiness and joy that sustains them through life. I want them to be well-adjusted, free-spirited, confident boys who grow up knowing that they are important, that they are loved. I don’t want them to ever question who they are. I want them to love life and see the joy in every day.


But… how do I do that? How do we manage that amongst the struggles of daily life, the piles of laundry that never gets folded, bills that need paid, doctors’ visits, stress, arguments, temper tantrums, dirty refrigerators, sibling rivalry, breakfast, bath time, naps, vitamins, broken toilets, cooking and cleaning?
Each day is a journey, and my goal is to give them everything, but the reality is that I often fall short. Every day I’m learning, trying, working harder to get where I want us to be. I’ve recently been reading Pam Leo’s “Connection Parenting” a life-changing book, and in it she talks about the gap between what we learn and what we are capable of doing. We have the awareness, but it takes us time to actually get into the practice. I feel like I am forever living in that gap; I’m forever thinking and learning, and always ahead of me, like a dangling carrot, is this image of what I want for, but I can never seem to get there. The picture changes, more layers are added, pushing it further ahead of me.

Still, this picture, of the future, of my boys grown up, of a home full of love and laughter and life, is what sustains me, is what keeps me focused on trying to be the best I can- more patient, more attached, more connected, more compassionate, more creative, more organized, more open, and more comfortable with who I am and who I want to be.